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Posts Tagged ‘Chad Kroeger


Our world is filled with some pretty amazing people. I can name atleast 5.  Nelson Mandela, Matt Damon, Laura Stradiotto, Robin McNicoll and James Franco.  Unfortunately we are also surrounded by quite a few douches.  If you look up douche in the dictionary the face of two men will appear.  Chad Kroeger and Nicolas Cage are captains of the douche factory.  We’ve already interviewed Chad so now we’ve decided to see how Nic would answer our celebrity interview.

Nicolas Cage was born on January 7, 1964 and since his mom was unable to stuff him back in he started his douche quest. I’ve always wondered how this incredibly unfortunate looking man with no substance made it into the entertainment business.  I’ve asked experts like David Suzuki, Bill Nye the Science Guy and Antoine Dodson and they all said they don’t really know, fo’ real!  Then I wikipedia’d him and found out that his uncle is  Francis Ford Coppola.  Sooo….maybe that’s how?  I don’t know that’s still a stretch. 

See Nic’s answers to our interview below. *Note all answers are based on a true story

1) What is your favourite 90’s sitcom?
I liked that commercial with the guy that everyone thought ate too many chocolate bars.
That’s a commercial.
Ya but he didn’t even eat a lot of chocolate bars, he just had acne.

2) Do you own any music by Rita MacNeil?
I banged her and by Rita I mean this 19 year old girl that I knocked up and married.  I’m so great.

3) Do you have any nicknames?
Substancetard, Dumb ass mo fo, Kim, Copolladouche and my mom called me Nancy but that was before the change to my no no parts.

4) Do you have a favourite youtube video? If so, what?
Love this video. I feel like it really shows my versatility as a hair model.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uNz0POlwQP0

5) Do you have a favorite hat? If so, please describe or send us a photo of you wearing said hat
I have this one tattooed on my butt.

That is a tattoo with a squirel wearing a hat.
Pretty cool right!

6) Do you have any hidden talents? If so, please describe, or send us a video of you demonstrating said talent whilst wearing your favourite hat mentioned in question 5.

My mom says I’m pretty.



Okay, so we haven’t received anymore responses from celebs yet, I think they are all taking time to answer the questions. They are pretty complicated. So in the meantime, we decided to practice on Chad Kroeger, so we don’t get rusty.

Nickleback formed in Alberta in 1995. The band members bonded over their mutual love for photographs and screen doors. After 15 long years, they are still around, singing about things on Joeys head (who cares about whats on joeys head, who the hell is Joey?!!!) AND Chad Kroeger still hasn’t cut his hair. ughhhhhhh. I hate you chad.

see chads fake answers (but probably very close to the truth) below!

1) What is your favourite 90’s sitcom?
Loved Fred Penner
no chad, that’s not considered a sitcom.
Oh…that’s too bad.

2) Do you own any music by Rita MacNeil?
If by Rita MacNeil you mean my own music, then yes, I have a whole room full of glorious rita macneil music

3) Do you have any nicknames?
oh you know, the usual: mophead, teen-stash, douchebag (the last one is my favourite)

4) Do you have a favourite youtube video? If so, what?
Oh man, I watch this one all the time. really awesome stuff

5) Do you have a favorite hat? If so, please describe or send us a photo of you wearing said hat
yep. this is my favourite hat.
Thats not a hat chad, that’s a pickle.
oh.

6) Do you have any hidden talents? If so, please describe, or send us a video of you demonstrating said talent whilst wearing your favourite hat mentioned in question 5.
Not many people know this but Im really good at modelling. I can stare right into your soul through a photograph.
“look at this photograph, everytime I do it makes me laugh”
stop singing
“how did our eyes get so red? and what the hell is on Joey’s head?”
WHOS JOEY?!!!! what a stupid line. you’re the worst.


Well we all know Tiger Woods is a clear douche. What we didn’t know was he is a huge Nickelback fan. This in my mind is the worst indiscretion of all! Ugh. Can you imagine the 2 of these guys in a room together. Vomit.

Look at this photograph. Every time I do it makes me laugh (by laugh I mean hate the world for thinking Chad Kroeger is some kind of musician)


There are not many things I truly hate. Velvet, chocolate covered shrimp (yes, I have actually eaten this) and Nickelback.

Can anybody tell me why their music is popular. Tell me please.

I mean SERIOUSLY…look at this douche. His hair probably feels like velvet. Ugh.


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